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While there are plenty of things you can do in the moment to make a tough conversations more comfortable, preparing for one starts when you first meet. Cultivating a warm and safe environment takes time and patience, but it can relieve pressure from difficult conversations when done well. Before any issues arise, parents and nannies should begin nurturing their relationship with honesty and mutual respect, and it is important for both parties to learn the best ways in which to communicate.

Here are a few ways to build strong communication skills together:

• Directly ask your nanny how they best communicate and how they’d like feedback presented to them. This can also be a great interview question to see how compatible your family may or may not be with a potential nanny hire!
• Set clear boundaries and expectations as soon as possible. Leaving little to no guessing room can prevent future misunderstandings and mistakes.
• When an issue arises, address it calmly and quickly before it becomes significant. Avoiding this can build resentment and anxiety and make the home feel uneasy.
• Actively listen to your nanny. By providing a space of understanding and one where they know they will be heard, your nanny should have less issue bringing up any concerns
• Schedule regular check-ins! These don’t always need to be super formal, but setting aside some time, even once a month, can help a nanny feel more confident that they can speak to you!

While improving communication is a never-ending practice, like any great skill, it gets easier with time!

Whether it’s an issue of performance, scheduling, payment, or any other problem, sometimes, it’s necessary to have a proper sit-down discussion with your nanny.

Here are some tips on how to best navigate tough conversations with your nanny:

• Come from a place of warmth—accusatory statements, such as “you always do XYZ,” can cause spikes in anxiety and a feeling of the need to defend oneself. Instead, try to rephrase this, such as “I’ve noticed a few instances where XYZ is happening. Can we discuss how to address this?”
• Leading with empathy and respect by adding supportive notes and some of the less so ones. Call attention to their strengths and reassure your appreciation for your nanny. Try to remain direct but gentle. Remember, parents, you are your nanny’s boss! How would you want your boss to speak to you?
• Schedule a time to discuss the issue but be sure to inform your nanny about what you’d like to discuss. This can help ease anxiety and give your nanny time to prepare for the conversation.
• Try writing out what you plan to discuss beforehand. This can help you reflect on the feedback you’ll give and stay direct and on topic.
• Avoid assigning blame – we are all learning and growing! Give your nanny a chance to do the same.
• Don’t shy away from silence. While it can be uncomfortable, everyone has different processing times and sometimes needs a moment or two to collect their thoughts.
• If your nanny has thoughts on the tough conversations, actively listen and try to understand their point of view- in fact, welcome their input!
• Make sure you’re on the same page before the conversation ends. Work together to find a solution that works for everyone involved!

After you’ve had the difficult conversation, give it some time, then check in with your nanny to see how the solution you’ve made together is working—you can always adjust if needed!

Review your family’s childcare needs with a counselor at �鶹�ؽ� and find your nanny today! Please email us at info@nannyauthority.com or call us at (973)-466-2669 to get started.